15th June 2007: I was sitting on my terrace and tears rolled down my eyes in sync with sweat on my shirt. My best friend came to console me but I just couldn’t let go. I was filled with rage and determined to hit back. I had failed to secure a good rank in my engineering entrance examination. My wise friend said to me, “let go, its just an exam”.Some people are born lazy, I was born stubborn.
I was always in control.I had never failed before. There is a certain comfort in staying in control even if you are unhappy. Familiarity is your biggest enemy. I joined engineering, diligently learned everything and accidentally got a university rank and campus placement. I was appreciated by all, it was amazing, I was in control. Still, it wasn’t magic. I had taken another controlled decision without understanding myself. I was still searching for freedom and purpose.
April 2013, two of my best friends made an impromptu plan for Goa, I trusted my instinct and said yes.The fact that I didn’t inform my manager is another story. It was one of the most memorable trips of my life. I was finally letting go of my inhibitions and was more open to uncertainty. I understood what freedom felt like. It’s a choice to listen to your heart.
May 2016: My heart broke again, it was summer again and I felt stupid again. But this time, with tears rolling down my eyes, I poured my feelings onto paper. It was a spontaneous decision and led to my passion for words and poetry. Now poetry is another language to me.It’s a meditative process where I can truly be me. Now if anything goes right or wrong in my life, I turn to poetry.It is my compass of life.What`s your compass of life?
December 2016: I was looking to overcome my fear of public speaking. Waking up early morning to go to Mumbai toastmasters Club didn’t look like a clever decision then. I never really joined because I was lazy and still in control. In control of my comfort, my boundaries, and my limited belief. One day, I simply let go and dived in and joined Agnels toastmasters. I listened to my heart.2 years and 3 months later, Here I am, narrating this story to you.
November 2017: I had just undergone a medical test. A week later, reading the report astonished me: my sugar level was high. Now I had become an expert in letting go and being spontaneous. Once I grappled with my emotions, I again went back to my core. My instinct, my gut feeling, and my compass. It said, start running. I again plunged in. Never looked back since. I run daily and have successfully completed 2 half marathons and the latest one under 2 hours. Now running is a natural part of my life It took a medical report and lots of carbohydrates to discover my passion, but I am happy that I listened to my heart. Running is life for me and the most organic way to keep me happy and fit.
The serenity of the mountains excites me more than the hustle bustle of the city. I always dream of getting lost in the woods and then on the streets. I asked myself: how can I? I listened to my heart again. It was a spontaneous decision to trek on the Himalayas. Thus my passion for trekking was born. Some of the greatest and happiest moments in life are rarely understood. Joy of successfully completing 2 Himalayan treks and making some lifelong memories and friends is irreplacable. Yes, I was spontaneous. I discovered so many of my passions and interests just because I followed my instincts.
I know what I am saying ain’t funny or maybe it is. My next calling is to try humor writing. I am joining pathways humor path to explore this new passion.
Spontaneity has hidden magic, these moments have no perceptible logic. yet you plunge in, feeling up to the brim, your life is just a folk tale having a beautiful story and graceful rhythm. Trust your instincts for they already know, dive in with complete faith, spontaneity has hidden magic. Let go, simply flow. Life is long and beautiful, make sure to retain your glow.